Questions and Answers

     Well today was one of those days were I just thought to much. At least I did when I wasn't to busy goofing off. I caught myself questioning my faith again for like the millionth time in history. I always seem to have problems sticking to my beliefs. Its not that I don't believe in what I am trying (poorly) to follow. I just can't seem to make that connection to divinity that I use to have, back when I was a Christian. But alas I can not return to Christianity. Long ago I tried and failed. It felt like I was lying to myself and denying who I am inside. Regardless of all this I found myself looking back at Christianity and longing for that connection I once had. I even caught myself wondering if I converted to Catholicism or Gnosticism if I would find it again. I was seriously considering turning my back on all I truly believe to see if I could just find that spark again. And here is where I found myself, on my way to make a post about it. Right before I started my post I decided to check the blogs I am following and unbelievably there was a post on one similar to what I have been going thru.
     After I finished reading said blog I found the answer I was looking for. I realized how far I have drifted from what I once was and how much I have neglected my faith. I have been a horrible pagan, no wonder I haven't felt that spark in such a long time. At this point I realize exactly what I am missing and what I need to do. One of my problems stems from not having a working altar, which I am going to fix tonight. I also need to consecrate my tools and cleanse the area. I also plan to begin doing a daily devotion. I use to do this when I was a christian so it should help me get back in the groove of things. I once again feel that warmth I have always had toward my beliefs. That feeling of love, pride, and so much more. I feel joy again toward it all and I am really excited to get started. I also plan on spending more time out in nature since Autumn is upon us, and I can go out without burning to a crisp.
     I feel like everything is going to be alright and that I am on the right path again. It feels like it did the day I decided to follow paganism and my heart. Somethings need to stay in the past, like me and Christianity. That is certainly a path I do not wish to tread again and I need to realize that. I have severed ties with all that and it needs to stay where it belongs. I once hid myself in that religion. I hid from heartache and the unknown instead of meeting it head on and healing. I am a stronger person now and no longer need to hide. I shall meet the unknown head on and on my own terms. Also if anyone is wondering that wonderful blog that helped me is http://priestessoflight.blogspot.com/.